Sakura....again...and again

So, another sakura convo...more waiting. It's fine for now, but I don't know when I'll start to feel like that again. The verdict? I get to keep waiting. It's somewhat understandable, somewhat not. Austin said he would hope they'd be gone before christmas. I've alreayd been waiting like a month...and I'm afraid this conversation pushed the time back.

Final verdict? I get to wait an unknown amount of time while she treats me unequally...she says it shouldn't bother me...but I just can't help it sometimes...sigh.

So the big question becomes....how can I keep my feelings (speaking of feelings that I should be treated equally here) at bay until she's ready? I wish I could just turn them off and give her however much time she needs...but I obviously can't do that.

I have anime/manga...but it's also not like she's the only one in the chatroom...it's not as simple as just leaving until she's ready, so that's basically out of the question.

I guess I can keep asking God what to do...He will either tell me what to do, or fix it Himself.

I feel mostly alright now, I'm just afraid the inequal thing will rear its ugly head again. I think if I had another girl that I considered as (or could be) a TRUE friend, it wouldn't bother me so much...but I've always said that girls hate me, even as friends....perhaps I didn't realize how true that was.